Loneliness: The Importance of Social Connection
Many people will feel lonely at some points in their lives, as loneliness affects around 25% of Australians. Although everyone’s experience of loneliness will be unique, loneliness is often described as the feeling we get when our need for rewarding social contact and relationships is not met, in quantity and/or quality. Loneliness can often leave a person feeling vulnerable.
Because loneliness is not always the same as being alone, people can feel lonely in very different situations. For example, you might be content with very little contact with other people, and choose to live alone, while others would feel lonely in the same situation. Or you may feel lonely, even though you are surrounded by people. You can still feel lonely while you are in a relationship, part of a family, or very socially active, particularly if you don’t feel valued or understood by those around you.
While it is normal to feel lonely from time to time, long periods of loneliness or social isolation can have a negative impact on your physical and mental health. In fact, research shows that lacking social connections is as damaging to our health as smoking 15 cigarettes a day, and can increase our likelihood of earlier death by 26%. Loneliness increases the risk of high cholesterol, cardiovascular disease, and high blood pressure.
In terms of mental health, there is good evidence that loneliness increases people’s risk of cognitive decline, risk of developing clinical dementia, experience of stress, and symptoms of depression or anxiety. However, the relationship between loneliness and depression is reciprocal - experiencing chronic loneliness is likely to make depression worse, and one of the symptoms of depression is increased social isolation, as it is more difficult to connect with others when depressed.
On the flipside, research tells us that the stronger our social connections, the healthier and happier we are. Social connectedness is a predictor of overall wellbeing, and has been shown to increase our resilience to stress and trauma.
Loneliness can be experienced for many reasons, including:
Living alone
Losing someone close to you through death or relocation
Feelings of loss or grief
Disconnection from family
Mental health conditions: for example, depression or anxiety
Feelings of being “different” or rejected by others, or fear of this happening
Language or cultural barriers
Access issues: Difficulties with mobility, illness, or transport, resulting in inability to socialise
Change of role: Retirement from work, or starting out in a new role or community (e.g. starting university, relocation for work)
Change in location (e.g. moving home)
Geographic isolation
It is generally acknowledged that older people are more likely to experience loneliness through factors such as loss of a partner or friends through death, living alone, or inability to take part in social activities because of lack of mobility or transport issues.
However, research has recently highlighted that young people aged 15-25 years are also experiencing elevated rates and intensity of loneliness. It is relevant that this age group is very connected via social media, and the quality of these connections is not sufficient without face-to-face interaction. Furthermore, the selective nature of what people post on social media can lead to unrealistic comparisons being made, leading to dissatisfaction with social connections and feelings of loneliness.
Reducing Loneliness
Recognising what types of social connections are rewarding for you, and meet your social needs, is an important step in knowing how best to fulfil these needs. Do you simply need someone to share time with? Do you feel most connected when sharing an activity or interest? Maybe you feel closest to others when exploring meaningful conversation? There is not a single ‘right’ way to connect, but connecting meaningfully is most beneficial.
Some ideas about how to improve your social connection:
· Connect with others – this may sound obvious, but when you are lonely it is harder to feel like making contact with others
o Connect with friends and family – reconnect if you have lost touch, use technology if distance is a problem.
o Accept invitations to socialise, even if you don’t feel like it
· Get out and about
o Exercise, shopping, or going to public places can be opportunities to have small daily interactions that hold loneliness at bay, and make interacting with others easier. Chat with the shop assistant, or exchange comments at the gym.
· Get involved with your community
o Get involved in a hobby, join a club, enrol in study, or learn a new skill. Find out what is available near you and start something you’re interested in with like-minded people.
· Volunteer
o Volunteering helps others and has been shown to increase feelings of social connectedness
o Volunteering Australiais an organisation that can help you find volunteering options that may suit you
· Online groups
o Meetup is an internet site that organises online groups of people with similar interests. Crucially, however, the groups organise offline meetings and activities so you can take part in person.
Although solving the problem of high levels of loneliness in our society will probably need community and government involvement, we can all do our bit to help address the problem. Focus on face-to-face friendships, reach out to neighbours, and contact family are all small acts we can do to improve our social connection and help those around us to benefit too.