Coping Skills for Children: Using Distraction

I have previously explored some relaxation skills, such as calm breathing, grounding and visualisation, which children can use in many situations when they feel anxious or afraid. While these skills are very important and helpful, there are other strategies that children can also learn and use. One of these is learning to use distraction in helpful ways. 

Importantly, distraction strategies are not a way of teaching children to ignore or push away difficult thoughts, feelings or problems. It is still important to encourage children to identify and consider their thoughts and feelings, and solve their problems, at some point. So why teach a child distraction skills? Well, they can be particularly helpful in a couple of situations:

1. When a child is feeling worried or anxious they are often in fight, flight or freeze mode. They can feel emotionally overwhelmed and not be able to deal with their anxiety or stress immediately. This inability to cope can show in many ways, including outbursts of anger or distress, or withdrawal. The child may need to take some time out before being able to processing things. In this instance, distraction can provide the necessary break, giving the child’s system time to calm down, and their brain the opportunity to move from an emotional state to a thinking state.

2. Sometimes a child is faced with a stressful or worrying situation where they can’t control or solve the problem. Mostly a child can do something to try and make a situation better (e.g. talk to a parent or teacher about a problem in their class), but sometimes there is nothing they can do about the situation (e.g. their puppy is sick and at the vet).  When this happens, children may find it impossible to stop thinking or worrying about the situation, and it will often stop them from being able to focus or functioning well. When this happens, it can be very helpful to use a distraction to take their mind off their stress. By focusing on something else, the child can deal better with stressful situations that can’t be controlled or made better.

Distraction Strategies

There are many simple distraction strategies that children can be encouraged to use when they might need a break or something else to focus on. The possibilities for distracting activities are endless, and it is important to choose activities that will work for each child. Creating a list of appropriate activities with the child (draw them for younger children) can provide a ‘menu’ of options for when they feel like distraction would be helpful. 

Here are a few suggestions:

Play

Play is a great way of helping kids take a break and relieve their stress. Play can take many forms and can include activities like: 

·       Board or card games

·       Play with a pet

·       Play with a friend or family member

Creativity

Creative activities can provide distraction, but can sometimes also provide a way of expressing or exploring feelings and thoughts. Some creative distraction strategies include: 

·       Drawing

·       Painting

·       Writing a story

·       Finger knitting

·       Making a comic book

·       Making a friendship bracelet or beaded jewellery

·       Designing/making a paper plane

·       Origami

·       Make a card for someone

Other suggestions

·       Reading

·       Watch a movie

·       Baking or cooking

·       Planning something fun to do

·       Do a jigsaw puzzle

·       Listen to music

Don’t forget that distraction strategies can also be helpful to adults in similar situations – give them a try yourself!